| hmm so i have been having a really tough time here lately. it seems like no matter what i do its just not right! it just turns out wrong. part of it is bc of my stupidity and horrible decision making. i should have known that things would turn out just like they did lasttime and i would just be stuck here thinking and having no one to talk about it. and i know that bad things come out of certain things but what do i do? decide o it will be ok and than go do w/e and guess what?! something bad comes out and i sit here feeling like a fool and can't believe i said that or did that and i just want to slam my head against the wall just thinking! omg i had the choice but i made the wrong one which seems to leave me here just wanting to cry. it just wont stop replayin in my head. i would just give anything for it to just disappear |
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| | Holding anger is a poison. It eats you from inside. We think that hating is a weapon that attacks the person who harmed us. But hatred is a curved blade. And the harms we do, we do to ourselves. |
Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable.
Feelings are not supposed to be logical. Dangerous is the man who has rationalized his emotions.
| They speak of my drinking but never think of my thirst |
Depression is anger without enthusiasm If you want to test your memory, try to recall what you were worrying about one year ago today.
| As memory may be a paradise from which we cannot be driven, it may also be a hell from which we cannot escape. |
Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well. Life is a comedy for those who think... and a tragedy for those who feel. |
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| so wow im finally a senior!! its crazy to think about...i can already tell time is gonna fly im probably gonna stay busy most of the time w homework and cheer but that is A ok with me. i am finally happy for once not really sure what happend...i was in such a horrible mood friday i felt sick and everything was pissing me off but than i finally hung out w all 3 of my girls that night and it was pretty fun i just forgot about everything and its just kinda stuck wich im glad...decided there were alot more things to be completely happy with. |
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| So this weekend was great fun!!! totally celebrated ashleys b-day all weekend...i love my chickas...not enough words to describe all the crazyness that happend...but we went and saw rv it was actually really good...loved how me and ash made fun of peoples laughs..bc they laughed at the stupidest times...o yea we also wrecked ashleys car...but somthing that happend after that pissed us off even more o and her car is ok thank goodness!! welp gues i will upload some pics on here since facebook is totally gay
 
 
 
 
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| so im really upset right now...so i decided hmm maybe if i write it all down it will help...so hmm today just hasn't been good not really sure y...the sad thing is there is no reason for me to be upset at all i can't think of one thing...maybe me just tryin to pretend i am happy is finally catching up w me...but ok so i got to cheer and julie was like well i have had complaints about football lines so we gotta switch it up..im like ok...but than she is like we r drawing #'s to see where u go...ok that isn't really fair either bc i mean ur friends w everyone on the squad but time just seems to go by faster when ur by people u usually hang out w...well i was like i will be ok as long as....and than once i drew my # i realized that as long as...had happend and i was like great!! im soo fucked!! ok i know things dont always go my way but seriously!!! i dont deserve that kind of torture!! bc that is exactly what it will be!! and hmm how ironic is that that the person who had a problem w the lines ends up being front and center...just another thing to boost her ........goodness im soo horrible!!!!!! lets just say im not a happy camper...i know things rn't that horrible i donno y im so upset really wish i woudln't be but i am and i hate it~!!!! |
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